Leap of Faith

Today's reading is about Thomas. He told the others he would only believe when he saw Him and touched Him. After revealing Himself, He told Thomas, "You are able to see and touch me. Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have come to believe." That is, us. 

We were not there when they crucified Him, we were not there when He appeared to those who believed in Him, we were not there when He presented miracle. Yet, we believe in Him. We believe we will one day unite with Him, like the others have gone before us. He will raise us up at the end of the day. He will walk with us on this life. We will be part of Him on the next life. People say, this is called "FAITH".

One of today's Praise and Worship songs was "Power of Your Love". I must admit, I wasn't sure of His love after my baptism. The phrase of "He loves you" sounded very distance. I couldn't feel it at all. Today, after three years, He has taught me, day by day, about this phrase. I'm still experiencing it. It is not easy, as I cling on human so much for so many years. I rely on another being's love. This love is so vulnerable... so weak... Little bit of shakes will crumble this love, regardless you build it in 3 days or in 3 years or, even 30 years...

Only by His love, I can be assured. For He will not betray, He will not turn away, He will not hide. He will always be there to welcome me, like He does every Sunday. He will always be ready, to give me a hug.

Here is the lyrics of "Power of Your Love":

Lord I come to You 

Let my heart be changed, renewed 

Flowing from the grace

That I've found in You

And Lord I've come to know 

The weaknesses I see in me 

Will be stripped away 

By the power of Your love

Hold me close 

Let Your love surround me 

Bring me near 

Draw me to Your side 

And as I wait 

I'll rise up like the eagle 

And I will soar with You

Your Spirit leads me on 

In the power of Your love

I hope, one day, I will say in return: "I love You", with all my heart and all my soul.

原宥

原宥﹐ 並不是件容易的事。 尤其是對你深愛的人。 那可能是幾年﹑ 幾十年的事。 

有人一輩子都沒有原諒對方。 以為已經忘記﹐ 以為忘記就算原諒。 等到要緊關頭﹐ 才猛然發現﹐ 根本沒有原諒。 回到了原點。 我承認﹐ 這需要時間。 不是一﹑ 兩天﹐ 甚至一﹑ 兩個月的事。 這期間﹐ 悲傷﹑ 自卑﹑可能還有憤怒﹐ 都會不時地出現。 

呵﹐ 還最忌“找借口”。 都是因為他﹐ 所以我無法專心讀書﹔ 都是因為他﹐ 所以我退步了﹔ 都是因為他﹐ 所以我無法投入工作﹔ 都是因為他﹐ 所以我自暴自棄... 千萬不可。 因為他不會內疚﹑ 回頭。 內疚而回頭又如何? 你還會想繼續麼? 能擔保在接下來的三﹑ 五年他不會重蹈覆轍...? 這才發現﹐ 原來愛得不夠深。

小時候﹐ 長輩不是常教我們﹐ 跌倒了要自己爬起來嗎? 不要耍賴﹑ 在地上打滾﹐ 因為沒人可以幫忙。 你可以坐在地上休息﹑ 擦傷口。 可是一定要站起來。朋友和家人可以借肩膀給你﹐ 可是站起來走的人﹐ 是自己。

只有原諒對方﹐ 才能釋放自己... 這是一門藝術﹐ 一道智慧。 有那麼一天﹐ 你會感激他。 因為你釋放自己﹐ 活得更好。

只有努力生活﹐ 愛惜生命﹐ 才是對自己最好的交代。 


Forgiveness, it is never an easy task. Especially to your love ones. It could go on for years... 

Some people have never forgive others throughout their whole lives. They think they have forgotten, and forget is forgive. Until on the dead bed, they realize they have never forgiven... Well, they return to the original point - didn't forgive. I must admit, it takes time. It is neither one or two days, nor one or two months. During this period, sad, anger, or feeling inferior will occur. 

Oh,  we also need to avoid "excuses". Because of him, I can't study. Because of him, I can't do well in my papers. Because of him, I can't work properly. And, give up on ourselves... Shouldn't. He won't turn back or feel bad. Even if he feels bad about you, will you accept him again? Will he repeat in 3 or 5 years time? You will realize then, you don't love him that much... 

When we were young, we have been told to get up by ourselves when we fell. No one could help you. You can sit down and clean your wound. But you have to stand up by yourself. Your friends and family will only lend you a hand. YOU are the one who will stand up and walk. 

Only through forgiveness, you set yourself free. This is an art, a piece of knowledge. One day, you will thank him. As you release yourself from this, you live better. 

It is for your own sake when you live your life to the fullness and take good care of yourself.

This Is It

Went to watch "This is it" with my friends. I was never a big fan of Michael Jackson. 

Affected by the media, in the last few years of his life, I read his news like I read other Hollywood people news. This "movie" totally changed my view towards MJ. 

How serious are you towards your life? And how much effort are you willing to put in your career? For MJ, he wanted to show his fans the best. Even of his old songs, he made sure they were to sing as if he was singing them for the first time. He remembered all his songs, all the lyrics, every single notes... Every note, every tune and every step was to be perfect. He loved what he was doing. He spent time with his team to make sure he created an impact, gave the best to his fans.

Now I understand why he was so successful. His PASSION.

I hope you have the same passion towards your life.

復活節守夜

受洗禮已經三年。 每年的這一天﹐ 我都會想起三年前的那一天。 今晚也不例外。 RCIA團每一年都不遺余力﹐ 讓受洗禮的我們﹐ 能感受祂的愛。 記得當年我非常興奮﹐ 凌晨三 ﹑ 四點才睡。 今年﹐ 凌晨五點才上床。

神父在他的講道中提到“信念”。我們常說﹐ 我相信我所看到的。 我們也許會盼望在兩千多年前﹐我們可以跟隨祂。要是我們當時在祂的身邊﹐ 我們真的會相信祂嗎? 這麼多人當時在祂的身邊﹐看﹐ 他們做了什麼? 連祂的信徒﹐ 在接下來的一生都一直在掙扎這份信念。 如果﹐ 今天有人在禮拜時站起來說他是神之子﹐ 有人會相信嗎? 所以﹐ 我們看到的﹐ 不一定要相信。 所看不到的﹐ 如信仰﹐ 信不信由你。 “復活”是另一個掙扎。 當其他人離世時﹐ 我們常安慰說他/她已上了天堂﹐ 祂提昇了他/她。 可是當我們的近親離世時﹐ 我們變得好像相信人生只有這一世。 呵﹐ 怎麼會這樣?

每年的這一晚﹐ 我總在看2007的我和今天的我。 我的信仰在成長嗎? 從去年的這一天到今天﹐ 我做了什麼? 我是越來越靠近祂﹐ 還是遠離祂?


我可以肯定的是﹐ 我開始相信祂會給我祂認為對我是最好的。 我必須承認﹐ 在過去的兩個月﹐ 我被挑戰這份信念。 也許因為﹐ 我的禱告沒有回應。 但﹐ 每當我發現祂的用意﹐ 我的信念增加了。 信念增加時﹐ 就表示我越接近祂。 希望會有那麼一天﹐ 我會完全相信祂。 希望這一天不是我見祂的那一天... ^_^

Easter Vigil

It has been 3 years since I was baptised. Every year after that, when I went for Easter celebration, I often thought of my baptism night. Tonight was the same. The RCIA team did a wonderful job every year, give us a lot of gifts, help us to "believe in Him". I was so excited that night when I was baptised and stayed up until 3 - 4am even though I was exhausted. This year, I only went to bed at 5:00am.
Father mentioned about "Faith" in his Easter homily. Seeing is believing, we always say. Some of us might wish to be there 2,000 years ago. But even when we were there, would be believe in Him? There were so many people around Him then. Were they all believe in Him? Even His disciples were struggled. If He appears today, stands next to us, will we believe in Him? So... belief, is not always "when we see it".

"Resurrection" is another struggle. When other Christian brothers or sisters pass away, we will say, they have gone to Heaven, or the Lord has raised them up in resurrection. But when our closed relatives are gone, we tend not to believe there is a better life after this...

Every year of this very day, I look at the past (on my baptism night) and now. How's have my faith grown throughout the years? What have I done and gone through since the last Easter and now? Am I drawn to Him more or away from Him?

What I'm sure is, through these years, I have increased my faith. I now begin to believe He will give me the best (He thinks of me). I admit that these past two months were a test of this faith "do you believe He will give you the best?" I too, struggled with my faith sometimes. Mostly because my prayers have not been answered. And I know there will be many struggles in the days to come. But each time when I realize what He has done for me, my faith increases. When my faith increases, it brings me closer to Him. Until one day, I will have no doubt in Him. I know that day will come. All I hope is, it won't be the day I unite with Him. ^_^